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Or, you blow the diet you’re on with a large slice of cake. The core beliefs might be something like “I am inadequate,” “I am unlovable” or “I never succeed at anything.” Jay’s therapist listed the negative thoughts that Jay told him would pop into his head, unbidden. “Is it really true that you are unloveable and inadequate? Jay’s therapist pointed out all the successful things that Jay had done, and how he was a good friend to many: you graduated from your university, you have a good job, you are a responsible and faithful friend, and you’re a good Catholic!Jay finally realized that his negative core beliefs were not true.Jay decided to talk with a therapist, who turned out to be a practitioner of cognitive therapy.

I’m not going to point a finger in one direction -- that’s a discussion for another time -- but my hunch is that the culprit is a clusterf*ck of many things.The key is to them with more accurate and supportive thoughts.Like an uninvited obnoxious guest, we need to get rid of those self-defeating thoughts.Now, he needed to stop the automatic thoughts from rushing in whenever he was under stress.We need to recognize when self-defeating thoughts automatically rush in and take over, high-jacking our moods and our lives.

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